Welcome to another prank-filled slurp of of 2schooners with jokes galore from around the world and around the corner as we examine all that was April Fools Day 2011. So pick up your beer, plonk yourself down on a whoopee cushion and kiss goodbye to what remains of your dignity as we tumble headlong into another boozy episode of Two Schooners…

Here’s what we talked about in today’s show:

• What were your favourite April fools jokes
  • Gmail Motion http://mail.google.com/mail/help/motion.html
  • Giant Meat Ant
  • Man Super Glues Hat to His Head
  • The Story of the Giant Napkin, the possum and the missing comma… (@tom125)
  • Steve Resigns and Joins Bill
  • April 1 Techcrunch’s “Big List”
  • The best April Fools Jokes of all time
  • #59: Daylight Savings Contest (1984): the Eldorado Daily Journal, based in Illinois, announced a contest to see who could save the most daylight for daylight savings time. The rules of the contest were simple: beginning with the first day of daylight savings time, contestants would be required to save daylight. Whoever succeeded in saving the most daylight would win. Only pure daylight would be allowed—no dawn or twilight light, though light from cloudy days would be allowed. Moonlight was strictly forbidden. Light could be stored in any container. The contest received a huge, nationwide response. The paper’s editor was interviewed by correspondents from CBS and NBC and was featured in papers throughout the country.
  • Neil Patrick Harris did a Stephen Fry for April Fools (not sure what it says about Stephen Fry?)  @ActuallyNPH Neil Patrick Harris I’m sick of these negative responses! Rude, hurtful, constant – it’s too much. I’m leaving Twitter. Love to say I’m joking, but I’m not.

Music

Thanks to Big La vs. Todd for the awesome remix of Public Enemy we played on today’s show.  We found it at Bandcamp.com

Public Enemy – Harder Than You Think (Big La Remix)
from Big La: Remixes by Big La vs. Todd

Lifestyle PodNetwork Mobile Apps

Download the Lifestyle PodNetwork App for iPhone, Android devices, and Nokia phones. Stream all your favourite Lifestyle PodNetwork podcasts directly to mobile device.  Download now for free!

iTunes Review

No less than 22 Reviews in the Aussie Store! With 27 5 star ratings!
Do us a massive favour and write us a review in the iTunes store… (and we’ll be your best friend, promise… no really, we will)

Click to write us a review for Two Schooners in the iTunes Store

Like Two Schooners? Check out our other podcasts:

• Podcasters’ Emporium
• The Aussie Geek Podcast

Be a part of the Two Schooners Community

• Buy us a beer, and support the humanitarian work we do here at 2Schooners
• Leave a comment about the show in this blog
• Follow @2Schooners on Twitter
• Click the Tweetmeme button and let people know you’re listening
• Follow Dave and James on Twitter
• Please write a review for Two Schooners in the iTunes store
• Send an email or an audio comment (we love those!) to yourshout@twoschooners.com
• Tag a weird story in delicious with 2Schooners, to add it to ‘the bag’
• Vote for Two Schooners on Podcast Alley

Welcome to another fun filled edition of 2schooners, coming to your ears in less than 2 months… A show built on the uncertainty principle and where nothing is sacred except the beer! Fresh from the holiday thaw, thanks for joining us this Australia Day for a podcast infused with an Aussie flavour of errr beer…

Here’s what we talked about in today’s show:

• Sam Kecovich Lamb Ads – 2011.
• Beer dispenser fills from the bottom (Youtube)
• Schooners sail into British pubs
• flypower.com – no shit make paper planes powered by flys…
• Paul the Octopus to get a Shine – WTF!
• Crematorium to Heat Swimming Pool

• Please, Donate to the Queensland Premier’s Flood Relief Appeal

Lifestyle PodNetwork iPhone App

Download the Lifestyle PodNetwork iPhone App and stream all your favourite Lifestyle PodNetwork podcasts directly to your iPhone.  The App is free and available now in the iTunes Store.

Music

Thanks to Ioda Promonet for the music we played on today’s show.

Di Johnston
“Companion” (mp3)
from “Fascinator”
(Undercover Culture Music)

Buy at Napster
Buy at Amazon MP3
More On This Album

iTunes Review

No less than 22 Reviews in the Aussie Store! With 27 5 star ratings!
Do us a massive favour and write us a review in the iTunes store… (and we’ll be your best friend, promise… no really, we will)

Click to write us a review for Two Schooners in the iTunes Store

Like Two Schooners? Check out our other podcasts:

• Podcasters’ Emporium
• The Aussie Geek Podcast

Be a part of the Two Schooners Community

• Buy us a beer, and support the humanitarian work we do here at 2Schooners
• Leave a comment about the show in this blog
• Follow @2Schooners on Twitter
• Click the Tweetmeme button and let people know you’re listening
• Follow Dave and James on Twitter
• Please write a review for Two Schooners in the iTunes store
• Send an email or an audio comment (we love those!) to yourshout@twoschooners.com
• Tag a weird story in delicious with 2Schooners, to add it to ‘the bag’
• Vote for Two Schooners on Podcast Alley

It’s Ditch Digging Prostitutes, Beer Towers and a handful of Esky Reporters in this overbaked, and yet wholly undercooked edition of Two Schooners, as Dave and James battle Dave’s externalised internal monologue with the beers opened, the nuts in the ashtray and the bar set entirely too low.  If this podcast was a meal, it would be a 3-day old prawn cocktail without the thousand island.  So it back, relax and enjoy the tanties and as we often say as we slouch on our red vinyl barstools – staring into our beers -  ”you dug that hole, now you can sleep in it!”  This is indeed one unsavoury plate of 2Schooners for your all consuming pleasure… so you will sit there and enjoy it!

Here’s what we talk about in today’s show:

• Sex and the King of Fruits (Eric Seale)
• Drunken Employee Shoots Server (Eric Seale)
• What if we Aussies were Governed by the Sex Party? (Eric Seale)
• Man threatens to blow himself up unless he gets an Egg and Bacon McMuffin (James)
• Another case of stating the bleeding obvious – died of medical causes!
• NZ student mistakes teacher for a deer, shoots her dead.
  • not the first time a NZ has mistaken an animal for a person
  • doubt it will change anything, sheep will still be nervous
• Spanish Prostitutes order to wear reflective vests

Rifftrax rework some vintage Australian TV

What’s 1970′s Australian TV without an American workover!  This was brought to our attention by Kylie from Geek Tragedy Podcast! http://www.rifftrax.com/shorts/dont-be-a-bloody-idiot

Dave’s mid-show beer tower…

Music

Thanks to Ioda Promonet for the music we played on today’s show.  Enjoy this track from Jack Johnson.

Jack Johnson
“Flake” (mp3)
from “Brushfire Fairytales (Bonus version)”
(Everloving Inc.)

More On This Album

iTunes Review

No less than 22 Reviews in the Aussie Store! With 27 5 star ratings!
Do us a massive favour and write us a review in the iTunes store… (and we’ll be your best friend, promise… no really, we will)

Click to write us a review for Two Schooners in the iTunes Store

Like Two Schooners? Check out our other podcasts:

• Podcasters’ Emporium
• The Aussie Geek Podcast

Be a part of the Two Schooners Community

• Buy us a beer, and support the humanitarian work we do here at 2Schooners
• Leave a comment about the show in this blog
• Follow @2Schooners on Twitter
• Click the Tweetmeme button and let people know you’re listening
• Follow Dave and James on Twitter
• Please write a review for Two Schooners in the iTunes store
• Send an email or an audio comment (we love those!) to yourshout@twoschooners.com
• Tag a weird story in delicious with 2Schooners, to add it to ‘the bag’
• Vote for Two Schooners on Podcast Alley

Who had the bright idea to put the Williams and the Gray in the same room!  The meeting of the minds happened in Sydney recently one Saturday night, and the result was far from spectacular. 

We have returned with fresh ice to the esky… We also found a great fridge on special at Harvey Norman, which is not an esky… The winter was so cold here that the beer froze over not to mention the whole barefoot saga… While Williams wrestles with technology I am wrestling with an inability to sing…

We have esky reporters standing buy stories of cash, balls, badly designed baths and strange chairs better left on the showroom floor, we are up in lights and drinking the good stuff… your listening to 2Schooners… I think I mentioned that…

Someone let the kangaroo’s loose in the back paddock and their running wild and causing a rukkus. 

This is Two Schooners #38 complete with a live audience and completely unedited from beginning to end (but you didn’t need to be told that!).  It’s an intriguing episode from the fellas, over a couple too many beers and cool bag of ice, and some entertaining esky reporters.

This is what we chatted about in today’s show

(and some stuff we were slated to talk about, and didn’t!)

• Piglet seized to recover debt
• Disposable shoes for disco goers
• Host sacked over dick shit
• Spoof Nobels
• Weird Travel Questions
• Fake Police Officer pulls Over Real One
• Man Takes Shower in the Wrong House
• Female Snails grow Penises on their Heads
• Woman Eats Mars Bar
• Man Stashes Cash on Scrotum
• Poo Art

Music

Thanks to Ioda Promonet for the music we played on today’s show.  Enjoy this track from the Groove Junkies.

Groove Junkies
“Far Away (TC Moses)” (mp3)
from “In The Zone”
(Morehouse Records)

Buy at Napster
More On This Album

Please write us an iTunes store review

No less than 22 Reviews in the Aussie Store! With 27 5 star ratings!
Do us a massive favour and write us a review in the iTunes store… (and we’ll be your best friend, promise… no really, we will)

Click to write us a review for Two Schooners in the iTunes Store

Like Two Schooners? Check out our other podcasts:

• Podcasters’ Emporium
• The Aussie Geek Podcast

Be a part of the Two Schooners Community

• Buy us a beer, and support the humanitarian work we do here at 2Schooners
• Leave a comment about the show in this blog
• Follow @2Schooners on Twitter
• Click the Tweetmeme button and let people know you’re listening
• Follow Dave and James on Twitter
• Please write a review for Two Schooners in the iTunes store
• Send an email or an audio comment (we love those!) to yourshout@twoschooners.com
• Tag a weird story in delicious with 2Schooners, to add it to ‘the bag’
• Vote for Two Schooners on Podcast Alley

Please check out our extended range of Two Schooners gear!

Visit our 2Schooners cafepress store where you can buy merchandise with our brand on it. Thanks to @regravity for the artwork! :)

We recorded Two Schooners Episode 36 at Easter.  During the recording of the show I said to Dave, “I’ve got a new Mac so this episode will come out twice as fast.”

Famous last words.

My brand new, one-month old Mac died during the edit, and went into Apple Support to be fixed.  Two long weeks, several phone calls, and a ’not happy Jan’ conversation with an in-store Apple support supervisor, they recovered 2Schooners 36 from my hard disk and gave me a completely new machine.

So today, I picked up the Mac, finished the edit and am getting it out to you.  Show notes to come later.

Here’s hoping this one is not a lemon!

Enjoy this episode!
James

What we talked about in this show

• Fillet-O-Slap Perfectly Reasonable IMHO
• Rudd/Williams Transatlantic Stouch
• Pro’s for Horny Miners
• World’s first electronic underpants

Thanks to our Esky Reporters

• @Woollymittens
• Erk and Judy from Channel Erk
• and our resident no-show @knightwise

Music

The music in today’s show was sourced from Ioda Promonet, here are the details:
Magic Bullets
“Lying Around” (mp3)
from “Magic Bullets”
(Mon Amie Records)

More On This Album

In a week where you can literally taste the dust, Dave’s mixer get’s a taste of the liquid gold, amber courage and comes off a little worse for wear. Not as bad as the new name for Vegemite as some marketing bright-spark genius decides that ‘isnack 2.0′ will convince more people to eat their poo-brown concoction of processed cheese and the old Australian favourite. This is just some of the tastiest morsels simmering away at the bottom of the bag, this week, as Dave and James settle in to the bar, with an ice-cold brew for the 30th episode of 2Schooners.

At this point, the guys would like to un-thank Herne for the 30th Episode cake, and remind all our listeners to send in your pictures to adorn our 2Schooners twitter page to yourshout@twoschooners.com

Please Tweet this episode

Enjoy the show, and don’t forget to tweet that your listening – and include the URL to the this show which is here: http://u.nu/9pk

Here’s what we covered on Two Schooners this week

• Cameraman shagged by horny bird
• School Answering Machine Message
• Worlds Earliest SatNav
• The Ig Nobel Awards
• Bra Gas Mask Combo
• Omitting Items from McDonalds Orders to Save Money
• Woman pulls gun on cop as chihuahua deal goes wrong
• Wanted: volunteers to move 400 crocs
• Vegimite iSnack 2.0 WTF?
• German cops impound motorised beer crate
• Inmate hacker locks down jail computers
• British Airways Charges to Choose Seats
• Prisoners Get Drunk on Hand Gel
• Email Auto Response Ends up on Road Sign
• Watermelon has Same Effect as Viagra
• We are doomed if we were Ever Attacked by Zombies

Our cover shot this week:

Youtube Videos

Two Schooners Stuff

Visit our new 2Schooners cafepress store where you can buy merchandise with our brand on it. Thanks to @regravity for the artwork! :)

Beer Choices:

Effen Beer (check out the cool site)

Sponsors

We’re looking for a sponsor for the show. If you’re interested, send us an email to yourshout@twoschooners.com. If you can think of someone you think should be sponsoring our show. Let them know.

Music

The Music on Today’s show was sourced from Mevio Music Alley. The artist was The Consultants, and the track was “Have you Googled yourself today?”

Like Two Schooners? Check out our other podcasts:

• Podcasters’ Emporium
• The Aussie Geek Podcast

Be a part of the Two Schooners Community

• Leave a comment about the show in this blog
• Follow @2Schooners on Twitter
• Send us your beer pics to add to our @2Schooners twitter background
• Follow Dave and James on Twitter
• Please write a review for Two Schooners in the iTunes store
• Send an email or an audio comment (we love those!) to yourshout@twoschooners.com
• Tag a weird story in delicious with 2Schooners, to add it to ‘the bag’
• Vote for Two Schooners on Podcast Alley

Yes folks it’s an episode of stupids and dyslexic tuckfards on this episode of Two Schooners. Nothing is sacred, except the liquid amber as the duo of schooners arrive and Dave and James settle in behind the mics to let rip at ‘stoopids’ everywhere.  Pull up a stool and join us at the bar with a coldie and a packet of Nobby’s nuts as we try to work out whether Google does indeed have an answer to everything. And if we don’t well, shit happens, and nobody will be any the wiser.

Send us your pics of your favourite beer as we decorate and renovate our 2.0 Schooners twitter background with your photos, pictures and contributions.  Drop your pics to yourshout@twoschooners.com.

Tag yours with 2schooners in delicious to get yours in the bag.

If you enjoy the show subscribe in iTunes – use the links on this page.

Here’s what we covered on Two Schooners this week

Youtube Videos

 

United Breaks Guitars

Bush Mechanics

Cosi
 

Two Schooners Stuff

Visit our new 2Schooners cafepress store where you can buy merchandise with our brand on it. Thanks to @regravity for the artwork! :)

Beer Choices:

Tsing Tao

Sponsors

We’re looking for a sponsor for the show. If you’re interested, send us an email to yourshout@twoschooners.com. If you can think of someone you think should be sponsoring our show. Let them know.

Music

The Music on Today’s show was sourced from Mevio Music Alley. The artist was Hemmit and the track was called Summertime.

Like Two Schooners? Check out our other podcasts:

• Podcasters’ Emporium
• The Aussie Geek Podcast

Be a part of the Two Schooners Community

• Leave a comment about the show in this blog
• Follow @2Schooners on Twitter NEW!
• Follow Dave and James on Twitter
• Please write a review for Two Schooners in the iTunes store
• Send an email or an audio comment (we love those!) to yourshout@twoschooners.com
• Tag a weird story in delicious with 2Schooners, to add it to ‘the bag’
• Vote for Two Schooners on Podcast Alley

Dave Gray and James Williams finally meet (in person) after recording the Two Schooners podcast for seven months. They are joined by Cait from the Aussie Geek Podcast in the studio in Sydney. Together they recap the 2Schooners/Podcasters Emporium/AGP meetup in Sydney on 10 July 2009.

Thanks to @misswired, who took some awesome shots at the events and shared her camera around.  Here are two awesome shots of James doing his Uncle Fester impression and Dave being… well, Dave.

Thanks to @regravity for the Two Schooners artwork and we’re pleased to say that the t-shirts will be in production soon! (as is yours Timmy!)

Thanks to everyone who came to the meetup and our post-event breakfast on Sunday. It was great to meet all of you. Hope to catch up with the rest of you, sometime soon, too!

If you’ve got more photos of the event, then please send us a message to yourshout@twoschooners.com or leave a message here on the blog!

Carlos Bertonatti
“The Little Things” (mp3)
from “Times Are Good”
(The Rosemine Group)

Buy at iTunes Music Store
Buy at Rhapsody
Buy at Napster
Stream from Rhapsody
Buy at Puretracks
Buy at mTraks
More On This Album